The Merchant of Miracles

"Hello! You have reached the magic box voice message thing-a-ma-job of the one, the only, the magnificent Merchant of Miracles! Leave a message, and I will try to get back to you as soon as possible, especially if there;s a payment of a few shiny gold coins involved! If you're trying to reach Mr. Fancycakes or his fanclub, this is the place to leave a message, too. Arrivederche, Say-oh-narra, and guten bye!"


*BEEEEEEP*

The Merchant of Miracles was usually in the shop on Tuesday, but he had much bigger fish to fry today. Nahasapeemapedilon was on his own, because, apparently, some weird curse had settled in over the weekend, turned the Merchant into a very obnoxious (but impeccably dressed) singing robot assassin that not only broke the Merchant's cart, but then used some weird magic flute magic to entrap the unicorns within the debris of the cart.

Seriously, who does that?

At least it seemed...mostly salvageable, though that Scaramouche the Merciless really did a number on the Merchant's precious cart all the same. That was his house! That was his livelihood! He was practically naked without his cart! Granted, the cart had been through worse before, but that didn't take the sting out of the fact that the Merchant was going to wind up spending all day in the front yard trying to mend the pieces of his broken cart. It was no small task, which might explain the very loud litany of very creative curses* that accompanied all the hammering and sawing, sanding and drilling.

____________
*He was from a family friendly franchise, after all.


[[and open post is open!]]

Early Monday morning, just after that first bright moment of dawn started to paint the world in brightness and warmth, a very towering little cart pulled by two fat little goats with horns tied around their heads "unicorns" and driven by a very short man with big nose and little shorts came tearing and rumbling and rattling down the causeway at a breakneck speed. It was really a miracle that the thing didn't just tip over, especially with how sharply it was going around the corners as it weaved down various streets, the contents inside jangling and the wheels squeaking away. It somehow managed to get through a good part of the town, especially the west side, before coming to a jerking, near-toppling halt in front of 63 Serendipity place.

"Look at that lawn!" the Merchant of Miracles proclaimed, which wasn't much, sure, but it was pretty generous for the other ones. "I think this is just the place, Mr. Fancycakes! Hup!"

At a much slower pace, the cart rolled onto the grass, stopped again, and the little man hopped down from the tall height with surprising grace and agility. The "unicorns" promptly started to munch on said grass as the Merchant hobbled over to the building there. The door opened, that was a good sign, and a quick glance around proved that it was empty without any signs of habitation. "Looks abandoned to me!" he announced happily. "Until now, that is! Alright, Mr. Fancycakes, come on in! This'll be a great place for you to call your own!"

Mr. Fancycakes continued to nibble the grass with his fellow "unicorn" friend. The Merchant of Miracles narrowed his eyes a little, then shrugged. "Alright, alright, take your time, that's fine. But I've got work to do, so if you plan on me helping you move in, you better thing again!"

The "work" mentioned included setting up the blocks on the cart wheels to make sure it stayed where it was while he scrambled back up to the very tall driver's seat and started sorting through a bunch of paperwork regarding this new island and all the treasures that he'd been promised would be there.


[[ it's both establishy and open! ]]